David Mac

by Horror Sleaze Trash on October 4, 2012

 

David Mac is one of the greatest forklift drivers ever to emerge from the UK. His prose and poetry has been published in many mags, journals, sites, zines and blogs. He has various self-published collections available plus collections with Erbacce Press, Knives Forks & Spoons Press, Ten Pages Press, Writing Knights Press, and soon Like This Press. He likes blues music, guitars, cats, wine, and Humphrey Bogart.

The Sorta Shit That Happens To Ben John Smith Every Fucking Day, And Night

She took me home

took pity on me

we got undressed

I took out my thing

she showed me hers

But I saw it and said

‘What’s the deal here?’

‘Huh?’ she said

‘That!’ I growled

and pointed

to the words

tattooed above her

snatch

the words:

HORROR SLEAZE TRASH

‘It’s a poetry zine

from Melbourne

Australia

and I just really

really

love it’ she

explained

I grinned and replied

‘I know the rag

I write for it’

She gasped

‘You do? If you do then

I’m in love with you’

‘It’s true’

I said

‘So you’re a poet?’

she wanted to know it

‘Sure thing babe’

I told her

‘I’m a really great

poet

been published in

mags and journals,

sites, blogs and zines

all over the place

and

I have collections out here and

in the U.S.A.

just contact

lutonghoul@hotmail.co.uk for

info on how to

purchase them’

‘Wow’ she smiled ‘that’s

amazing

a real life poet but’

she paused

‘how do I know you ain’t just lying?’

‘You want me to

prove it?’

I said with a rapist’s smile

She nodded

So I did

I rubbed my thing till it got

good and hard and

began to stretch out and

pump

And then the girl saw

Proof

The words along my shaft:

REALLY GREAT PO

‘Where’s the ET?’

she asked

‘The tattooist

died towards the

end’ I lied

Thinking: If only I had

left out the word

REALLY

Really!

It seems

just being a great poet

is enough

to get

a fuck!

Previous post:

Next post: