John Dervishian

by Ian on January 20, 2012

John was born and raised in Cambridge, MA but now lives in Worcester. His claim to fame involves two actors who shall not be named, due to the probability of getting sued for using names without consent. Aside from writing, he enjoys playing the guitar (not so well), a nice cold Jack and Coke or Guinness, and reading to people who will listen.

A Lesson In Listening To Others

For 3 weeks straight
she called every night
looking to come over
what did I care
I had nothing else going on
I’m not sure why
I never considered myself
a great lover
but one person’s trash
is someone else’s treasure
so maybe I was hers

there would be very little
in conversation
we would strip down
have sex
make some noises
smoke cigarettes
like the orgasms were
all that great
and then just lay there
that was the most real
I ever felt
as her finger tips 
gently moved
up & down
torso to chest
and back

she would then try to talk
about “us”
future plans
likes
dislikes
I would pretend to listen
as I remained in my own sanctuary

morning would come and she would leave
just as she came
with very little conversation

the phone stopped ringing after a while
I wondered what happened
I guess I should have paid more attention
to what she was saying

she probably broke up with me
and I didn’t even know it

“What is wrong with you?” she says

I smoke pot, enjoy
having a Jack and Coke
at a kid’s bday party
hosted at a glow
in the dark
bowling alley
and write “nonsense”
up on Facebook

and here I thought I was
getting better
6 years of fucking therapy
6 years of fucking medication

I’m cured

my therapist thought I
was doing so well
that she graduated me to
group therapy

3 females and two males
(including myself)
the second youngest
of the group

the 1st youngest was a
27 year old female
who could not seem
to get over her ex

one session she came
in with marbles
she found on the side walk
after the winter thaw

she gave me one marble
when she quit the group
and followed her dream
growing vegetables in Maine

so there I sat with
an even group now
soon enough the one male
drops out
just doesn’t show up
leaves a message on
the facilitator’s voice mail
that there is now a conflict
between his job and sessions

then the eldest of
group retires from her
position in our functional
group

so now the group
which is not really
a group
is down to two

the demise of the
family

sessions end due to
lack of participants

all I’m left with is one
marble
more than
I had when I started

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