Rob Dickerson #2

by HST UK on February 19, 2014

norwich

Don’t be offended

What a delusional, bizarre, presence we had to this not so much forgotten false idea.
Is it of our own importance that this dysfunctional accommodation is built upon our hopes and dreams like spoken words from the mouth that feeds us with these thoughts but never results to what is needed and is always carefully avoided…..

My eyes are opened to the amazement of what faith does for some people…
Why is that ?
Why is it that people try to grasp onto something they cannot see, feel or touch with their idle hands but still believe there is a much greater force that can strike us down at any giving time.
Are you a sinner or a saint? Who can tell? When you hide behind the very fabric of your suffering with a pale face and a mysterious gleam in your eye….

The winters are colder for you now. No time to sit around and think of things that could have been. Not everything is what it seems, so keep going forward with the clarity you have. Because let’s face it, compassion is inevitable for the ones that surround you with their plausible thoughts of madness.
There are no promises in these dreams I have, as when I wake everything becomes full circle. Should I force this unpleasant seeking notion with every drop of blood from my veins just to get ahead of the game, or ponder in my own self belief that the dreams I have are a phase that cannot be entwined into my own madness..

My past is too real to fake like the voices that echo and linger in the wind with no train of thought for who is there listening, unravelling their little secrets piece by piece like letters from a forgotten time…
I’m constantly looking over my shoulder for any chance, any given opportunity that maybe one day I will be at peace with my own thoughts. Let’s just hope that one day we will all understand the meaning of our lives. But for now I will just sit and watch the tide pass back and forth, taking away these unsettled thoughts…

 

 

From a son to a mother

It’s been twenty six years since the last time I saw you but ever since that lugubrious day I’ve had the funny feeling that you have always been there with me. Like a second shadow observant to every stride I’ve taken in this unbalanced life.
I’ve seen you in my dreams before..
You never talk but just stand there and smile but when I wake I still can’t paint you from memory.
I can’t help but wonder if things would of been different if you were still here.
Whether my life would of took a different path instead of this cantankerous, ignorant, disconcerted life I lead today..

Have I been led astray or has this path already been determined for me?

There’s not a day that has gone by that I don’t think of you.
Like a passing reflection that always lingers in the back of my mind and never leaves.
I wish I could still remember what your voice sounds like..
I wonder if I would still recognise it today like the familiar sound of sea waves crashing on the sands of the earth…..

It’s funny how things turn out.
How life always finds time to throw a curve ball right at you at any given time just to remind you that life isn’t always easy..
You have no resting place for me to visit, nowhere to go to place flowers, drop tears and tell you how much you are missed every day.
The months go faster every year as I get older and older like the second hand of a clock being spun around by someone wishing for the day to go at breakneck speed…

You had troubles in your own life that could not be resolved or untangled I guess there are just some things we cannot undo no matter how hard we try. I hope one day there will be a day when I can say that the things that have happened in my life have made me the man I am today, Will I learn from my mistakes and accomplishments that have been placed upon me in this shell of a body that is my own destiny. I guess time will tell for all of us in the end but until then I will just have to play the waiting game and hope one day we will meet again….

Previous post:

Next post: