BETTER CIGARETTES AND OTHER POEMS by PHILIP VERMAAS

by Horror Sleaze Trash on June 6, 2013

BETTER CIGARETTES AND OTHER POEMS / PHILIP VERMAAS

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SPIDER IN THE GARDEN

 

Hunched in the dark
on familiar filthy stairs
brother to the thousand
garden spiders
spinning midnight webs.
I take a rolled cigarette,
rolled badly at that,
to count the long seconds
I’d otherwise forget.
I take a large neat whisky,
twice and twice,
the only toast
to my tro
ubles and cares.
It’s hell to see beauty
everywhere,
then to look again
and see nothing there.
It all begins to look like
the solitude and loneliness
that crawls on spider legs
down my neck.
Beauty looked back
for a while;
twined her legs
and took
with p
leasure
this spider friend
to web.
Now she’s unspun,
moved on,
and I’m back
on familiar filthy stairs.
My web of longing
intricately expanded
waiting for daylight
and one more
golden dragonfly
to come along.
It’s all that’s in me
at this moment,
the hung
er for
the food of beauty.
No matter that it
will leave me
ever empty.
But
beauty is not beauty
unless there’s someone
to see it.
To the dregs
I drink
for my troubles and cares.

 

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